Ingredients:

• Potatoes (yukon golds are best)
• Whipping cream
• Butter
• salt to taste
• 1-2 bulbs of garlic
• olive oil

Gloria will tell you that I am a measure-twice-cut-once kind of cook. I am very careful with quantities, and I don’t improvise very well. This is the one exception, so I’ll go over quantity pretty carefully.

HOW MANY POTATOES?
It’s hard sometimes to gauge how many potatoes you need. You really need to judge what the rest of the meal is like and how fat your diners are.

They are all different sizes! Fuck you!

I usually go for around half a pound of potatoes per person, if you have time to measure. If you don’t, about four people is four potatoes that you’d chuck to ward off a medium-persistent robber.

Step 1. Roast some garlic. I think we’ve gone over this in an earlier post, so here is an MS Paint synopsis:

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUU--

Step 2. Boil potatoes. I usually cut the potatoes into 2″x2″x1″ cubes, but it’s not an exact science. Gloria likes it when I leave the skins on, so I am lazy and leave the skins on. Boil them until they cut like butter with a fork.

Step 3. When your potatoes are soft enough, drain them really well, then put them in a mixing bowl. Drop 1/2 a stick of butter in there for around 4 potatoes. (Actually, regardless of how many potatoes I use, there’s usually a 1/2 stick of butter in it.)

Step 4. While the butter is melting, retrieve your roasted garlic and pop the soft cloves out of their pods. Put them into the mixing bowl with everything else.

Step 5. Take an egg beater to your potatoes, low speed. While the eggbeater is going, pour some whipping cream in. Usually I use anywhere from 1/4 to 1/2 cup, but it really depends on the texture you want. We used 1/4 cup for about 3.5 pounds of potatoes last week, and it made a smooth, dense mashed potato.

Step 6. Season. You want to use some salt, definitely, but it’s at your discretion. I love throwing some pepper into mine, and maybe some Lawry’s seasoned salt. But if you’ve got only one bulb of garlic in there, less intense flavors are necessary. Remember, the base is creamy and buttery.

It does.

Sole à la meunière (Translation: Fancy-ass fish sticks.)

• 1 lb Dover sole filets*
• salt, pepper, flour, milk
• 1 stick of butter
• 3-4 tbsp fresh parsley, chopped fine

Season the sole filets with salt and pepper on both sides, then dip them in milk and dredge them in flour until lightly coated. Heat 4-5 tbsp of butter in a skillet on medium until melted and foaming, then fry the sole filets, turning once until browned on both sides. Remove the sole to a serving platter (cover it with a paper towel if desired), and remove the skillet from heat. In a fresh saucepan, melt the remaining butter and let it brown slowly on medium-low heat (it will turn a brown color and smell nutty). Carefully pour the hot butter into the fishy skillet, stir it to let the butter absorb the fishiness, then pour the resulting butter mixture over the fish. Sprinkle with the parsley and serve immediately.

* So apparently you have to be very careful when buying sole, because there are two species of fish named Dover sole, and one of them (the one I expect is more commonly available in American supermarkets) is not truly sole. They are both flat fish, but real Dover sole has a very delicate flaky texture and an unmistakable subtle taste which the other kind lacks completely.

The fishing industry is really sketchy with naming, by the way (another example is how basa swai can’t be labeled “giant catfish” even though that’s what it is, because the catfish lobby is just that powerful). I guess they figure that one white, flat fish looks the same as all the others!

Marmalade chicken

• 4 breasts chicken, butterflied and (optionally) pounded thin with a meat tenderizer
• salt, pepper
• olive oil
• marsala or sherry, for deglazing
• 2 tbsp butter (optional)
• 1 tbsp dried rubbed sage
• 1/4 of a white onion, minced
• 1 c chicken broth
• 1 1/2 c marmalade*

Pat the chicken breasts dry, season with salt and pepper, and brown in a skillet with some olive oil until just about done through. Remove the chicken and deglaze the pan with some sherry, turning the heat down to medium. Add the butter (opt.), sage, onion, broth, and marmalade, and let the sauce reduce for about 20 minutes. Add more broth and marmalade if it isn’t voluminous enough for you. Finally, replace the chicken in the pan, coat it with the sauce, and let it cook, covered, for an additional 10 minutes on low heat.

Variation: Use 2 duck breasts instead. Score the fatty side of the breast, sear it on both sides 5 min each, then keep warm in a 200˚F oven. Make the sauce using the rendered duck fat and no butter (unless you feel like it). Skip the last step and instead reduce 5 minutes more. Slice the breasts against the grain and pour the reduction over top to serve. This seems like a very good idea to me.

* We used Safeway’s Seville orange marmalade, which is a tad on the bitter side, but pleasantly so. Use your discretion: I believe in you!

• 5 large potatoes, cubed (skinned optional)
• olive oil
• buttermilk
• salt and pepper

Put potato cubes in a pot of warm water, bring to a boil, and then let simmer, covered, for about 30 minutes, or until potatoes are tender. Drain, add olive oil and buttermilk, and mash. Season with salt and pepper to taste.

Wilted spinach with garlic

• 4 large cloves garlic, sliced into thin slivers
• 1 lb fresh spinach
• olive oil

Heat olive oil and a little bit of salt in a small skillet over medium heat until shimmering. Add the garlic and sauté until fragrant. Add the spinach and cook about 10 minutes, stirring with a spatula so it cooks evenly.

I don’t have my mom’s recipe so the following is adapted from a few sources, notably Smitten Kitchen’s version.

Tortilla de patata (Potato omelet)

• 1 cup olive oil (don’t worry, you won’t actually consume the whole cup)
• 3 medium potatoes, sliced very thin (I never skin potatoes if I can help it, but you can I guess)
• 1 large white onion, quartered and sliced thin
• 6 eggs
• kosher salt

Heat the cup of oil in a large skillet (preferably with fairly high sides– remember that all the potatoes, onions, and egg need to fit!) on medium-high until very hot (about 3 minutes, when it starts to shimmer and little bubbles appear on the surface of the pan). Bring the heat down to medium-low and add the sliced potatoes, stirring occasionally to make sure that none stick to the pan. Cook this about 6-8 minutes, then add the onions and cook an additional 15 minutes, or until the potatoes are tender to the bite. Drain the potatoes and onions in a colander over a bowl; reserve oil. Meanwhile, beat the eggs and a few pinches of salt (say about 1-2 teaspoons, depending on your Daily Salt Requirements) until just scrambled, and then fold in the drained potatoes and onions slowly. While folding them in, you can chop up the potatoes a bit more (into half-circles or whatever) with a fork or wooden spatula, but it doesn’t matter too much! Let that all sit for 10 minutes.

Now heat about 4-5 tbsp of the reserved oil in a nonstick pan on med-high (I used a wok! since it’s what we had around) until smoking, pour the egg-and-potato mixture and pat it down so that it is relatively flat. Reduce heat to med-low. Run a spatula around the bottom so that a layer of egg creeps in under the potatoes and cook that for 6-8 minutes, shaking occasionally to keep the omelet from sticking to the pan too much. Eventually the top should begin to set: it should no longer be liquid, though still somewhat wet and runny. Now for the fun part: we have to invert the tortilla: (1) Equip oven mitts, (2) Get yerself a large plate, (3) Place the plate over the pan, (4) Turn it all upside down, carefully.

Refresh the pan with fresh oil if it looks dry, then slide the tortilla back in. Run a spatula around the tortilla and cook another 4-6 minutes or until a toothpick stuck through the middle runs clear, making sure to shake the pan every now and again. Serve warm or cold: either works!

A good accompaniment is some fairly standard garlic chicken (pictured above). Heat some olive oil to smoking on medium high, add garlic until it is fragrant and beginning to brown, and then some salted chunks of chicken. Cook all that until the chicken is done through, then add some sherry and toss the chicken to coat in the resulting deliciousness.

I consider pork to be the most mysterious of all the meats. An extremely reputable online encyclopedia has this to say:

Meat refers to animal tissue, especially that which is consumed as food. There are various kinds of meat, ranging from white meat such as (chicken or turkey) to red meat (such as beef). Some meats, such as ham and pork (both being meats of the pig) resist such strict classification.

As you can see, even creation scientists are baffled when it comes to pork. So far, pork is the most difficult meat I’ve tackled in the kitchen… Every now and then I get an urge to make something with lobster (like bisque! :q), but those recipes always begin with “dispatch the scuttling space monster by stabbing it in the brain stem, or by boiling it alive, you genocidal monster.” Yeesh!

The Pork Problem is probably well-known to all, but let me summarize: Pork sold in America has fairly low fat content, probably due to some arbitrary decree by the FDA. This means that it would be best not too cook it too much (as it dries out quickly on the stove), but! pork has also been known for centuries to harbor foodborne diseases (though less so today), so people are very wary of undercooked pork. Thus, if you want a nice juicy pork tenderloin without the whole “parasite” side effect, you really have to “cook it twice”: brown it in a pan, and then stick that pan in the oven for a while (until it has reached the federally mandated internal temperature of 150˚F).

Anyway, here is a unorthodox interpretation of a delicious pork-based meal I had while over in Germany, modified to fit the stuff in our CSA box this week + also a recipe from Gourmet that sounded yummy.

Curry-rubbed pork tenderloin with tomato-peach compôte (adapted from Gourmet 07/2009)

• 4 large garlic cloves, minced
• 1 tbsp ginger, minced
• 1 tsp curry powder
• salt and pepper
• 2 3/4 lb pork tenderloins
• olive oil for browning
• 1 medium onion, chopped
• 3/4 lb tomatoes, chopped into 1 inch pieces
• 1 peach, pitted and chopped (I did into eights and then those into quarters)
• 3 tsp dried thyme leaves
• 1/2 tsp brown sugar

Preheat the oven to 425˚F. Smash the garlic, ginger, and curry powder into a paste using your favorite paste-making method. The Gourmet-recommended method is using a mortar and pestle, but we have neither mortar nor pestle, so instead we used the flat part of our Ikea meat tenderizing mallet and pressed down really hard with our huge manly muscles. *flex* Anyway, once you make the paste, rub your tenderloin (lol) down with salt and pepper, and then rub it with the seasoning paste. Delish! Brown the two tenderloins in an oven-safe* pan for 5 minutes on one side, then flip over and thrust into the middle of the oven, cooking for 10-15 minutes**, or until it is done all the way through, or a meat thermometer registers something between 145 and 150˚F when inserted into the thickest part of the meat. (Hehe… meat.)

Alright! Remove the pan from the oven (the handle will be hot… I touched it with my hands because I am dumb it was not fun guys). Place the pork on a cutting board and let rest while you make the compôte. With the hot oven-pan on the range (all its pork juices intact), heat it to medium-high, then add the chopped onion and cook for 5 minutes, or until the onions are translucent and soft. Add the chopped tomato and peach, and cook until soft, 3 to 4 minutes about, depending on the kind of peach. Slice the pork against the grain, serve with compôte and also the pork-fruit-juice stuff that runs off.

* If you don’t know if your pan is oven-safe, here’s a good tip: Any pan made entirely out of metal automatically is (and up to 500˚F if it’s got Teflon). If it has plastic, it’s eitiher labeled or you shouldn’t try.

** Ours took about 30 minutes, but we had doubled the recipe. I’m still not really sure this makes any sense.

The next item on the menu is something my mother makes every Christmas. She makes it from a pre-packaged mix, though, so I thought I’d try to make it from scratch. It was pretty hard and it didn’t come out quite right the first time (still not sure why that is). Anyway… maybe you will have more luck?

Kartoffelklösse (German potato dumplings)

• 6 medium potatoes
• 1/2 c flour
• 1 1/2 tsp salt
• 2 eggs

Boil the potatoes until they are cooked through but still relatively firm, I’d say 15-20 minutes, then rinse them in cold water, dry them, and refrigerate them for at least two hours. Then grate them with the fine mesh of a cheese grater into a large mixing bowl. Add the flour, the salt, and the eggs, and stir it all up until it forms a pliable dough. If it’s too sticky, add some flour, and if it isn’t sticky enough, maybe add half an egg? it’s hard to say.

If you can form it into fairly solid 1-inch diameter balls, then it should be done. Do so, and then throw in “gently boiling” water for at least 5-7 minutes, or until they float to the top. Then remove and set aside.

And finally, something with vinegar to set the other flavors off. If you don’t know what caraway seeds are, they are what makes rye bread taste funny. They are not for everyone, and they are potent little f-ers, so “to taste” is key.

Summer squash “sauerkraut”

• 2 large summer squash, sliced into long, thin strips, then crosswise diagonally into 2-3 inch length slices (whatever!)
• 1/2 c white wine vinegar
• 1/4 c apple cider vinegar
• 1 tbsp salt (plus more to taste)
• 1-2 tsp caraway seeds, to taste

Just toss the ingredients together, adjust salt and caraway to your taste, and refrigerate for at least 4 hours. Serve cold.

And this is what it all looks like when it’s done:

I actually thought it came out very well, though the dumplings were less spherical and tasty than I had anticipated (do a google image search for “german potato dumplings” to see what I mean). The pork was juicy, and I actually really liked the squash stuff. I think it might be “what I do with summer squash from now on”… since I always kind of struggle with them. =)

It was an exciting day when I realized that corned beef & cabbage is not actually that difficult to make.

Of course, I haven’t actually tried corning my own beef or anything like that, but throwing things in a pot I can do, and did last Friday. Thought I’d beat the St. Patty’s Day rush? Someday I will have to experiment with corning, because grocery stores hardly ever sell corned beef brisket except in early March.

I put potatoes, carrots, and cabbage in mine. I chop up the potatoes and carrots into about bite-sized pieces, but you cook them long enough that they get pretty tender anyway.

The beef takes a couple hours to cook, so I usually put it on (water at a rolling boil) for an hour and a bit, and then chop the potatoes and add those, then chop the carrots and add those. The cabbage only takes about fifteen minutes to cook to the right consistency, so it goes in only once the potatoes and carrots are soft when you poke them with a fork (about 30 or 40 more minutes).

The pot typically gets very full. Lots of leftovers! Or enough to feed a large party, which I am rarely called upon to do.

One of these days I will learn to plan ahead and start cooking at, say, 4 PM; on Friday I didn’t get home from work/grocery store run until after 7, which meant I wasn’t eating until 9 PM. Oh well!